it's tuesday ... so of course you get some deep love and logic thoughts :)
tonight we talked about determining who owns problems that we are faced with every day - us or our kids.
this is a biggie for me. i am 100% guilty of taking on my kids problems. tonight was a good reminder for me to step back and realize that when i do that i rob them of a chance at learning something!
it's just so easy to think that if they do something like not getting their homework done, it will be a reflection of me. or that if they're late getting to school because they were too busy messing around that it's somehow my fault. but really ... those are their problems. and if i let them have to go to school without their homework done....or let them walk in late to class - they are probably going to learn a lot more from the school's consequence than if i had to nag them through the entire process.
tonight was a good reminder to just let things happen. to allow my kids problems to be my kids problems. not mine. to step back ... allow my kids to make choices ... and then plan to be there with a ton of empathy and love when they fail. AND ... to NOT respond with sarcasm and to NOT say "see, i told you." both of which i am incredibly guilty.
my goal is to step back, and allow my kids to learn that they are 100% capable of solving problems that they are faced with. and when they make the occasional bad choice i can let the consequences do the teaching and as hard as it is - just bite my tongue!
1 comment:
I am finding that after being SOLELY responsible for everything that my kids need for their first few years of life, it is hard to start "letting go" and letting them take the responsibility/freedom that they NEED to start learning to do! Parenting is such an amazingly difficult job, isn't it??
Thanks for sharing what you are learning, Sarah...I love hearing about it all!
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