it's ... now!

wow ... not even sure how to follow up a post like that ...

all i will say is ...

thank you.

i love you.

and i am 'sure' :)

and now, in my attempt to follow it up ...

i am jumping back to my one word challenge post.

although i believe there are a few words that really do captivate what i am feeling,

i have decided to choose a word that is little - but packs a lot of punch.

this word can take on many different meanings -

coming out of my mouth it can mean something very different than coming out of my 2 yr olds :)

my word is going to be ... now.

when i look back at what i said,

i realize that a lot of my problem is that i don't make time right NOW.

it is SO easy for me to get caught up in the fact that if i don't do my laundry NOW that tomorrow i will have more. or that if i don't chip away at the millions of thoughts running through my head right NOW that many of them will get lost :)

BUT...

while i'm doing that ...

i'm missing out on all of the little moments that i could have been enjoying.

the little moments that REALLY matter.

and too quickly those opportunites are lost.

the 'now' moments become 'then' moments.

and too often i can't get those back.

i know i have mentioned this before on my blog.

after seeing kung fu panda this quote really stuck with me

"yesterday is history

tomorrow is a mystery

today is a gift

and that is why it is called the present."

and my whole 'NOW' idea goes back to that.

this year i want to focus on the now.

i want to snuggle with my little guys NOW ... not tomorrow night.

afterall, tomorrow night snuggling may not be 'cool' anymore.

i want to REALLY listen to the people around me NOW ... not be too busy thinking about the things i should be doing to stay ahead.

i want to live, appreciate, laugh, play, and love NOW.

not tomorrow.

not yesterday.

today.

now.

the present.

MY present.

"sure"..... 14 years later...

4 simple letters. such a simple word. but what does "sure" mean to you? does it mean certain, or positive? perhaps reliable or trustworthy? all are valid definitions according to the Webster dictionary.

what about in the context of a first date? what about asking the most amazing girl you had ever met to the "prom alternative"? what would the response of "sure" mean then? would it be cryptic or mysterious for you? for 14 years that response has plagued me. it was ambiguous and vague. but what did it really mean?

For those who haven't caught on Sarah's blog has been hijacked :) A half awake Sarah easily gives up her password to Blogspot!

For some reason tonight... 14 years later.... the word "sure" takes on a whole new meaning. i can't explain why tonight of all nights.... but the ambiguity is gone. the word "sure" is no longer vague...

tonight the word "sure" defines the Love a young girl had for a scared and terrified boy so many years ago, though she wouldn't admit it at the time. tonight it defines the eternal Love a young boy had for the most beautiful girl in the world though he could not comprehend it's ramifications for the future. tonight the word "sure" means unfailing, assured, inevitable, and destined.

tonight for the first time ever... the word "sure" does not take me to the past. tonight the word "sure" takes me to the next 14 years and beyond, where there is no ambiguity... no doubt.. and no hesitation. tonight the word "sure" has transformed into the love that was, the love that is, and the love that will always be!

I Love you Sarah! I'm so glad you were "sure" 14 years ago.

You can have your blog back now :)

visiting baby nolan

today alex and i spent a good portion of our day at the hospital with kelly and nolan.

to give a little update/background -
nolan was admitted a week ago for a fever and troubles with his oxygen levels.
(keep in mind he was 9 days old at the time)
at the present he is being treated with antibiotics for bronchiolitis and bacterial meningitis.
because kelly took him in when she did ... everything is under complete control
and
he is basically a healthy baby boy that just has to spend the next 10 days in the hospital.
so ... all is good.

BUT ... i'm trying to help kelly stay sane (well at least i hope i am ... HA!)
SO we went up to have lunch and chat.

i posted a bunch of pictures on kelly's blog for her ...
BUT here are a few of my favorites :)
oh .. and i had a little fun while kelly was out of the room ;)
that picture is my ABSOLUTE favorite ...
it's my picture of the day - so hop over there to see it :)

you sure are a cutie, little nolan!
thanks for letting us visit with you today!

yep ... i'm full.

with the boys in good hands ...
(thanks pheebs)



stacey and i headed out for a night on the town ...



(YES ... that is a cart of meat ... and YES i think it is absolutely DISGUSTING!)

started it off with a little wine ...then added some good food!
(or so stacey says ... i STILL can't taste anything!)

and then we decided to finish it up with a 'small' brownie sundae ;)



i have a feeling the wii fit is NOT going to be very happy with either of us tomorrow!!!



OH WELL ;)

and by the time 11 pm came ...

my heart was full ...

my stomach was DEFINITELY full ...

and

the bed was calling!

being 30 is just not easy.

especially when we have a 2 year old who recently discovered our lollipop drum

AND

for whatever reason thinks 7 am is an appropriate time to play it.

hmmmm.

5 to 1

my day with 5 kids actually went remarkably well.

ben and carson spent a good portion of the morning out sledding.
(don't we have the perfect size backyard sledding hill?!)



and ... just like yesterday alex and adison spent the day following each other around and playing really well.

i included this picture to show the great lengths that alex goes to when it comes to choosing an outfit to impress a girl.

the kids all played well and kept very busy.
i've decided that i know i COULD handle 5 kids on a day to day basis ...
but what i can't imagine is doing the every day things that are normally quick.

running into target ...
going to the y ...
getting starbucks ...

let me just say there would be nothing quick about going anywhere with this bunch :)

a fun morning

this morning brought a lot of fun to our house ...

you see, my friend kelly's 15 day old baby is in the hospital.
at this point they aren't sure what it is ...
SO ...
i keep praying ...
AND ...
doing what i can to offer a little fun up to the rest of the bunch.

TODAY ...
adison and garrett were over to play.
with drew off at school, it worked out perfectly.

alex and adison play really well together -

they spent a LONG time dancing in drew's room ....



and just a LITTLE time sneaking toothpaste:)

(hey at least they share nice!)

as for ben and garrett ...
when the 2 get together they go from one imaginary scenario to the next
they honestly keep busy THE ENTIRE TIME they are together.
(i took this picture shortly after hearing ... 'hey let's get adison and alex' :)
i knew they had handcuffs and i figured the combination of the 2 PROBABLY wasn't going to go over so well ...
SO .. i disctracted them with the picture and it worked!)



you guys are a riot!

we're back at it again tomorrow ...
AND ... adding carson to the mix ...
so stay tuned ...

one word ... maybe

some of you may have read over on elizabeth's blog about my one word challenge.

along with the project 365 was a challenge to find one word that represent what i would really like to focus on this year.

SO ... i don't have a word.

i know what i want - but don't know exactly what the ONE word is.

SO ... after reading this ... if you know ... please, let me know :)

for this year i want to spend my time on things that matter.

not necessarily learn to prioritize

because i am a great multi-tasker and i get things done.

that's the not the problem.

the problem is that i need to be more intentional.

i need to stop all of the mundane multi-tasking long enough to REALLY focus on the things i want to be doing.

for example ...

stopping long enough to suggest to the boys we play a game - not just be approached.

stopping long enough to snuggle, watch a movie, and allow myself to enjoy it (not thinking of all of the other things i 'should' be doing)

stopping long enough to bake - and REALLY let my kids help :)

there is a diagram that our church uses that i want to briefly describe.

picture a target.

in the center is

'what i'll die for'

(these are the core beliefs)

the middle ring is

'what i'll defend'

(these are things that matter ... but your opinion may differ slightly from mine and that is ok because it doesn't affect our eternal outcome)

and the outside ring is

'what i'm willing to discuss'

(and this section is those things that there is no 'right answer'. because of this, spending time debating and trying to get to the bottom of it might be fun - but really isn't worth the time.)

as a church, they want to spend most of their time in the center, some of their time in the middle, and not a lot of time on the outside ring.

this is how i want this year to be for me.

i don't want to waste my time getting caught up in things that don't matter.

i want to focus on the relationships that REALLY matter to me.

i want to make time for what's important and let the other stuff, that isn't, be what fills the gaps,

not the other way around.

life goes too fast.

and

i don't want to miss it.

project 365

i started something on the first of this year, called project 365.
(no i didn't come up with it ... creating keepsakes magazine and becky higgins are my motivation behind it)

i am going to take a picture each day this year.
(or at least try.)
the picture might be of the kids.
it might be of stacey and i.
it might be a picture of a store we visit that day.

basically i want to capture snipits of our life that when placed together tell a bit more about who we are and what we do on an every day basis - without too many words.

NOW ...
initially, i was just going to organize the pictures on my computer ... and then maybe scrapbook them.
well...
i decided that it might be easier to keep track of ... and transfer to a book ... if i created a blog for it.

SO ... that's what i did.
my crazy loves project 365

i realize that you already have plenty to do in your day ...
so i'm not asking you to follow yet another silly blog of mine :)

INSTEAD ...
i just wanted you to know what that link is on my profile
AND
i want to say that i think you should try it too!

link to 365 different ideas to help you out!

creative play gone wild

although ben and alex have been to our children's museum many times ...
they have never experienced what they did over break.

they had picked out their groceries and taken them up to the nice young man at the counter.
he was VERY polite and helpful in telling them what they were buying.
AND he was very good at math and figured out exactly how much he was hoping they would pay him IN REAL CASH! (HA!)

THEN ...
as if this was a drill he had practiced while in 'supermarket checker training' ...
he hit the button on the cash register that makes an annoying, and non-stop, BEEEEEEEEEEP.
then yelled ...
'INTRUDER ... EVERYBODY ... DOWN!!!'
and proceeded to crawl under the register.

alex and ben exchanged a 'what in the world is he doing' look ...
and i sat over in the doorway giggling about everything i just saw!

the BEEEEEEEEP really does sound like an alarm.
and i found it so funny that he would think to act as though the childrens museum grocery store was under attack!

when i look back now i actually think it's a little sad that so many kids actually know about situations like this!

AND ...

i realize that maybe i need to teach ben and alex that if a crazy man takes over the grocery store, and the checker tells you to take cover, DON'T JUST LOOK AT EACH OTHER ... LISTEN! :)

Christmas recap

although it's already 2009 ...
and Christmas was a WHOLE week ago ...
i wanted to go back and just do a quick recap of what our Christmas looked like this year ...

as i mentioned ... it was probably one of our sicker holiday seasons ...
BUT ...
as always we still went strong!

the weekend before Christmas,
stacey's mom and brother (and family) came to visit.
the kids had a blast being together!
it makes me wish they could see each other more often!



THEN ...
on Christmas eve we headed to wisconsin.
we started out having some fun with my dad
then went back to sleep ... and woke up and did Christmas morning with my mom.
we were able to stay for a few days to hang out and play
which was nice
(well for us anyway ... i know they all LOVED it. thank God for lysol, i guess)

on saturday we returned to our snowy paradise (HA!) ....

so that we could be ready to play on sunday ...

elizabeth and crew were in town!

yet again ... the kids had a ton of fun playing and it made me wish that they lived closer.

when i look back .... i see that although i've gone through 4 boxes of kleenex ...

and don't remember a WHOLE lot of details ....

i know that we had a really fun week.
it was jam-packed.
but fun.

(and for the record .... the picture of my boys with aiden ... FIRST TRY!! how amazing am i.)