only with boys ...

drew didn't get to see ben's face until this morning.

his first response ...

"WOW BEN ... that looks SO cool!"

and ben wins ...

tonight it is official ...

ben is the first of our kids to need stitches!

he was at the new house with stacey and fell on a metal brace.

thankfully it wasn't that bad of a cut.

and thankfully ben is a SUPER brave kid!
probably braver than i would have been - so it's a good thing stacey took him!



now .. this isn't necessarily something one should get excited about being first at.

BUT ...

it got him a frosty.

at least that was enough for a smile :)

sweet dreamin'

last night on our way out of the party alex was given a caramel apple.

he held it all the way home ...

i brought him inside, asleep, and took it - thinking he had forgotten about it.

not even close.

he was still 1/2 asleep,yet he had enough in him to say ..
'caramel apple, mommy!'

seeing as though it was late and i knew i could never convince him otherwise ...

i let him hold onto it as he fell asleep, as well.

although he is sleeping on this VERY obnoxious pillow case that we got from children's hospital
(that he also insists upon) ...
i am hoping you can see the caramel apple held tightly in his grip.



i figure maybe holding a caramel apple in your hand brings sweeter dreams.

happy birthday katelyn

today was the day that katelyn, our old neighbor, was celebrating turning 5.

AND ...
since katelyn is ben's "girlfriend" (according to him) ...
AND ...
"the girl that is going to be his wife"



we had to help her celebrate!!

the boys had a blast running around in their big backyard ...
and enjoying all of the fun games that melissa had lined up.

we felt like we should have been paying her for entertaining our children!

thanks for the fun evening lawrences!
we miss having you so close to us!

getting there ...

well... we have sheet rock ..



it's mudded ...

and we have 3/4 a house of siding!!!

PLUS ... tonight we chose our lighting.

so our decisions are officially all made.
now we just have to sit back and wait!!

not that kind of girl

after today i have decided that i am not a very good "football mom"

to start with ... drew had football 4 times this week. (and does for the next 2 weeks)

3 of those 4 times are school nights. we have to leave here around 5-5:30 and don't get home until 8.

in my opinion he is in 2nd grade and that is just excessive!

it is just not necessary.

so today i finally decided to call and talk to the "director".

(of course i didn't tell him who i was ... because i don't want drew to be penalized for my opinions:)

he told me that they need to do all they can to make these kids successful.

well... my question is successful at what?

and at what cost?

we pretty much just agreed to disagree and i got off the phone.

i figured i must be in the minority and i am fine with that.

SO .. fast forward to tonight.

drew had a game at 6.

so at 5 we were in the absolute middle of a thunderstorm.

YET ... we got a call saying we should have the boys at the field in a half hour and the game was still on!!!

(i was rolling my eyes throughout the entire call ...thinking... you have GOT to be kidding me! you want me to rush and get all of these pads on my 7 year old and drive 10 minutes only to be told to go home!??!)

i was still holding out hope that they would call it on the field.

unfortunately ... this same director was in charge.

it was literally raining and lightning ... the ref called this director ... and you guessed it ... THE GAME WAS STILL ON!!

i was SO irritated.

now ... not only do we push our kids to spend a crazy chunk of their week practicing ... we place them out in the middle of a field ... in a thunderstorm. exactly what we typically would tell them NOT to do!

AHHHHH!!!

of course drew still played ... and every one was fine.

but that didn't change the fact that i was EXTREMELY irritated.

i seriously felt like the one and only person that was uncomfortable with those kids out there!

i want drew to be a kid.

i want him to be able to come home from school and chill - at least once in a while.

i don't want him to be pressured into having to practice and perform at a level that is beyond where i think 2nd graders should be.

i realize that every one doesn't think this way.

AND ...

i realize that not every 2nd grade team is run this way.

HOWEVER...

i also realize that we do baseball and soccer and i have never felt this way about either of those.

what it comes down to is this ...

as of tonight ... i realize that ...

a football mom i am definitely not.

puppy love

yes ... ben still LOVES dogs.
and
yes ... ben still REALLY wants a dog.



and that my friends ...

is why we visit my moms.

(well .. not the ONLY reason ... ha ha)

decisions ... decisions

after 2 days ...

and nearly 8 hours at the flooring store ...

we have made all of our house decisions when it comes to ...
carpet ... tile ... granite ... sinks ... mirrors ...wood ... and even grout!



although it seemed overwhelming at first -
the lady helping us really knew what she was talking about.
she slowly walked us through room by room ...
gave us her ideas ...
and then let us go from there ...
i even walked out with great ideas for specific paint colors (with brand, name, and #!)
all of the details are FINALLY coming together!

on a side note ...
the house has been a great distraction for me.
of course the baby is still on my mind 99% of the day.
BUT...
we have house decisions that can't wait...
we have places that we need to go...
and life can't stop...
that's good for me right now.

our house will be done in just over a month!!
we are busy preparing ...
and getting more excited each day!

NOW ...
if we could just find some lights ...

my top 20

well ... since sonya had this great idea to tag me ... i can't let her down ;)
i have done this before though ... and limiting myself to 20 today will probably be tough ..
SO ... go check out my old list ... AND ...

here are my CURRENT top 20 ...

1. going for a starbucks with stacey - grande nonfat 6 pump toffee nut latte with whip
2. my chaco flip flops
3. caramel apples
4. blogging
5. hugs from my boys
6. raspberry lemonade
7. texting/"surfing the web" on my t-mobile shadow :)
8. wolfgang puck express
9. portillo's chocolate cake
10. asics gel-nimbus running shoes
11. the beach club at disney world
12. hip hop music (and dancing to it)
13. short/comfy/cute/not frumpy skirts
14. tivo (fall shows start this week and i am THRILLED!)
15. pottery barn and crate and barrel (i know that' s 2. but i'm limited for space here!)
16. the navigation system in our car
17. super target
18. aveda products
19. mobile phone friendly websites
20. and of course ... last ... but DEFINITELY not least ... all of my family and friends who take such good care of me ... each in their own way!!

now ... i of course think each of you reading this should do this on your own blog ..
but ... since sonya tagged 3 ... i will tag 3 ...
elizabeth, kelly, and mary beth ... get busy!

our secret is out ...

yes ... he has oreo crumbs around his mouth.

yes ... he has a starbucks smoothie in his hand.

you didn't think he just willingly rode around while we got ideas for the house ...

did you?!

a tough day with a sweet ending

this morning was my surgery.

of course it was a hard day ...

one that i wouldn't wish on anyone ...

BUT ...

it feels good to have it over.

although i've had it done 2 other times ...

that didn't make me any less nervous.

thankfully ...

things went perfectly.

the nurses, doctors, and anesthesia team were all EXCELLENT!

in fact ... it only took the IV team one try to get me hooked up.
(when i went in to deliver alex it took 7 !

the nurses each tried and then the anesthesiologist just decided to do it himself)

so getting it on the first try is crazy!

now ... stacey is over wiring the house for our audio system ...

my 3 very tired crazies are sleeping ...

and i am enjoying pineapple dipped in chocolate from edible arrangements.

(a snack that i never knew that i liked - but now LOVE)

YUM!

thanks again to everyone that helped us out with the kids, left comments, sent notes, and called. it means a lot to know that people were thinking about and praying for us.

it's been a crazy few days -

but each day gets a little easier ... we get a little stronger.

and i can't ask for much more than that:)

running in the rain ... and worms

to celebrate turning 30 this weekend ...

stacey ran the chicago half marathon!

although i bailed on him ...

i am SO thankful that elizabeth and tim stuck it out with him!

of all weekends, THIS weekend happened to be what we have declared "the great chicago flood of 2008".

it rained from the moment we got into town friday - until the moment we left today (and i'm sure it is still raining now).

in fact ... it didn't just rain it POURED.

i'm sure each of them would say that they are glad they made it through 3/4 of the race before the cold front and horizontal rain set in.

AND ... bekah (my sister) and i would say the same thing ;)



although at points each of us wished we were running ...
we were the official supporters ;)

AND ...
supporting a race in this weather is not easy.

at one point we were running through a wet, muddy field to meet up with the runners ...
our shoes were sticking to the mud so we took them off and went barefoot.
it was then that we looked down and realized that we were running on a field of worms.
YUCK!

i think i decided i would have rather been running 13 miles :)



way to go guys!
you all did excellent!!
i am proud of you ...
AND ...
practice up because next year ...
i expect YOU to be like the guy who juggled the entire 13.1!

the big 3 0

stacey ... you have finally joined me in your next decade of life!

I love you!
I am excited to have a kidless weekend with you in chicago!

and ... trust me ... being 30 isn't all that bad ;-)

not much to say

this morning stacey and i went for my doctors appointment.

as has happened 2 times before ...

we discovered our baby's heart had stopped :(

NOW...
i realize it doesn't happen often ...

but right now i am at a loss for words...

still just processing how i feel ...

i'm feeling frustrated ...

it sucks to be sick for so long and not get a "reward" for it.
AND
it sucks to drag my kids through that time - and for them to not get a baby in return.

i'm feeling sad ...

although we had always said 3 was "our number" ...
we had come to accept the idea of a 4th ...
and were getting excited at how our dynamic would change.

but ...
just when we begin to accept things ...
they change.

unfortunately ...
things happen.
life isn't always fun.
every day offers new challenges
and more reminders of how fragile life really is.

SO...

for today ... i am holding tight to my boys ...



and
maybe tomorrow i'll have more to say:)

fall sports part 2

it wouldn't be fair to say fall sports have started ...

without showing a picture of ben starting soccer.

he's the one in the blue shorts.

does he look ready to you? ;)

note to self ... ben loves plants

this afternoon ben realized that the mothers day plant he had planted for me was sitting in the window and had died.

now ...

should one of our guppies die ... that "might" be purposefully ...

BUT ...

not ben's plant.

basically ...

moving and a sick (pregnant sick) mom don't mix well.

routines got disrupted ...

and the plant on the window wasn't one of the recipients of what little TLC i had to give.

we tried to "save it" - but we weren't very successful.

AND ...

today ben realized it.

AND ...

it was quite traumatic.

he cried ... and he cried ... and he cried.

he LOVES plants. he couldn't believe his plant had died. because he LOVES plants.

i felt bad that i had 1. let it get to that point and 2. not gotten rid of it before he realized it :)

BUT ...

i've learned my lesson.

ben loves plants and i will from this point forward pay GREAT attention to all plants that come my way.

i promised him that tomorrow we could go find another plant --
one that will actually survive our crazy life ;)
AND ...
HOPEFULLY ... because he LOVES plants so much ... he can learn to take care of it too ;)

alex's new do ;)

fall sports have begun!!

this week was drew's first football game - EVER.
(he is wearing the navy jersey - 2nd from the right on the line.)

he LOVES it.

it is perfect for his body and for him.
he is a tackle - so he gets to play offense and defense - so basically all game long :)

although they are still figuring out how to tackle -
and much of their time is spent just holding the other guys shoulders and "dancing" -
it is SO fun to watch!

GO PATRIOTS!
(but only when it comes to 2nd and 3rd grade football!)
we're looking forward to a really fun season!

top 5 things i hear each day

1. mommy?? ... we going to the mall?

2. mommy?? ... we go get drew now?

3. mommy?? ... we go get ben now?

4. mommy?? ... we go see daddy?!

5. mommy?? ... ben at school??

alex asks each of these questions OVER and OVER again each day

AND ...

i'm not saying he asks - and then waits an hour.

MORE LIKE ...

he asks ... then immediately follows it up with ...

"mommy?? ..."

and then asks again :)

silly alex...
you are so much fun.
i am loving spending extra time alone with you each day.
you are getting so smart ...
TOO smart ...
and i love it!

alex's new friends

with both brothers gone at school ...

alex and i have been finding little things to do to keep busy.

earlier this week we were walking through the store and we came across the perfect toy for alex.

the wonderpets and their fly boat.

being the fan that he is, alex instantly fell in love.

NOW ...

i typically don't buy toys on a whim -

BUT ...

knowing how lost alex has been without drew and ben ...

i caved.

it has proven to be a GREAT purchase.

lenny, tuck, and ming-ming have kept alex QUITE busy.

he takes them everywhere that we go.

he talks to them.

he carries them around.

he EVEN lines them up to watch diego with him.
(yes ... you are seeing correctly ... we may have a 42 inch tv ... but for whatever reason the show is still better when watched from 6 inches away)



thanks for saving the day, wonderpets.

1st day of school part 2

today was ben's first day of kindergarten!!!

he had a GREAT day and has already asked me if it's ok for him to write his teacher a note that says "i love you".

his teacher sent home a mad-lib type sheet for him to fill in (with my help) ...
i think it does an EXCELLENT job of summing up his day ...
SO ... ENJOY ...

today is SEPTEMBER 3RD and it is my first day of school! i felt GOOD AND EXCITED. i wore A GUITAR SHIRT. for breakfast i ate EGGS AND SAUSAGE. after that i was taken to school by MY MOM AND MY DAD. my teacher's name is MRS UNDERBAKKE. i met a friend named REN. the first thing we did in school was SIT DOWN AND COLOR CLIFFORD. then we WENT TO LUNCH. the part of the day i liked the best was when we WENT OUT FOR RECESS. when it was time to go home i felt GOOD. tomorrow i will THINK ABOUT MRS UNDERBAKKE.

ben ... i can't believe you are ALREADY in kindergarten! you are SO old. (or maybe i am!)
it seems like just yesterday that i was sending you off to preschool.
you are going to have such a fun year!
i loved hearing all about your first day and i can't wait for each and every day that follows.
i love you little buddy!

oh ... and ... way to go on already charming the teacher with your last comment ;)

1st day of school - part 1

(drew and his new 2nd grade teacher)

today was drew's first day of school.

not just ANY school ... but a NEW school.

AND ... it went REALLY well!

he walked out of school with a big smile on his face and couldn't wait to tell me how awesome it was.
in fact ... he said "it is so much better than madison!" (sorry all you mustangs! i still miss you if it means anything.)

he LOVES his teacher.
we were pretty sure he would - but i'm glad the first day has come and gone and he really does.
his teacher uses music a lot. he uses songs as a method of transition and at various other times throughout the day.
that is SO up drew's alley.

i went back and forth on where to send the boys for school.
at the beginning of august i had FINALLY decided that i wanted them to stay where drew had gone for the past 2 years.
i LOVED the school. i LOVED the teachers. AND we had all made great friends.
HOWEVER ... a week later i found out that was no longer an option.
first of all their kindergarten numbers were high - so ben would be a problem.
second - the district does open enrollment on a year by year basis so we would never be guaranteed a spot.
i just couldn't deal with the uncertainty of that.
SO ... with 3 weeks before school i registered the boys in a school that i had not even considered earlier.

HOWEVER...
i am SO happy with our decision.
the principal went above and beyond to fit the boys with teachers that together we thought matched their "styles".
he allowed them to start even though we aren't technically moving until the end of october.
(he would did not HAVE to)
i felt SO good about each of the teachers that were chosen for them
i had heard great things about the school
the boys knew kids there because of summer baseball - so they wouldn't be blindly entering a school of unkown faces
AND
it had the same "home-y" feel that madison had.

of course i still wonder how the boys would have done at madison.
and i miss seeing people there.

BUT ...
today seemed to go REALLY well.
AND ...
ben is SUPER excited about starting tomorrow.

SO ...
for now ...
i feel very at peace with what we decided
AND ...
i am VERY excited for a fun year!

we have windows!!!